• sitting in the waiting room

    “sitting in the waiting room of silence waiting for that still soft voice i know offering my words up to the rooftop to Your heart trusting that this closet’s where You are” ~waiting room, shane barnard we’ve been in the “waiting for a new job” waiting room for a little over two months now.  people often ask how we’re doing and my usual reply is “fine”.  everytime that word comes out of my mouth i think of all the times i’ve been told, especially at church, that most people really aren’t fine.  they either don’t want to take the time to give an honest answer or they don’t think the…

  • maybe this is how it's supposed to be

    we just finished dinner.  josh is at soccer.  the boys are playing memory in the living room.  amelia is doing her homework at the dining room table.  i am sitting with her, helping her when needed. i don’t feel like a mom.  at least not the way i thought i would feel when i used to think about being a mom.  i feel somewhat disconnected, like this is someone else’s life.  and then i thought, “maybe this is how it’s supposed to be.” maybe every mom feels this way.  maybe they don’t.  in some ways it’s like how i feel about being an adult.  every time i drop my second…